carefree girl pigtails


Yesterday I posted an Instagram story basically confessing about the hardships owning a business. I noticed in myself how difficult it was to get on camera and show a small vulnerability to mask an even larger one.

It became apparent that we want the world to see us as competent, successful people- especially- if we are in a position of leadership. We want people to believe we know what we are doing! But get this, it is possible to be completely competent AND not know what we are doing. 

Let's read that again.

It is possible to be completely competent AND not know what we are doing.

I hear it a lot from friends who own businesses or are starting various projects of their own. "I don't know what I'm doing" they say. I can imagine everyone feels like this at some point in their lives. First time mothers, individuals who switch careers, starting a first job, taxes! So maybe we feel like this more often than we think!

But we still don't want people to see a side of us that is not in control, even if this side of us is actually what gives us MORE in common than not. 

As I sat in my natural-light filtered room, with my phone in hand facing me... I sighed at the realization that making a simple video for our Instagram story would take more time and guts than I had imagined. Everything I thought I would say quickly disappeared as I stared at the selfie mirroring my insecurities. 

"Be real but be positive" I said to myself over and over again. A small mantra to keep me present. I filmed a less than perfect video and sent it into the crazy world of Instagram (as I call it) to be on display for 24 hours. 

Here is where the learning opportunity happened for me. An overwhelming support of followers, or friends (as I call them), came pouring in and sliding into my DM (direct messages). People sent hearts, positivity, and messages of understanding. People knew what I was talking about and were glad to hear someone say: Hey, it's me- although life seems perfect, IT'S NOT- because we don't typically let people see through the phone screen when it gets hard. 

And people like that.

People like getting real.

Maybe instead of hiding behind our screens we let people see a taste of our struggles. Maybe we show them that starting and running a business by yourself is not all glory as we make it seem. 

And maybe, just maybe, we build stronger connections through doing it because at the end of the day that is all we have keeping us going. Connections.